After a mother went viral for sharing a video of the 17 dirty diapers in her house, TikTok mothers began speaking out about what their “17 diapers” moments were during the postpartum period.
Hannah, who goes by @nursehannahbh on TikTok, is a traveling nurse and mother to two children. In early October, she was just weeks postpartum when she had her first solo day taking care of an infant and toddler. Since she frequently posts nurse and parenting content, she decided to film a relatable moment where she went back to pick up and count the collection of dirty diapers that had accrued throughout the day. Hannah warned, “I kid you not; my guess is probably 15.” As she went around the house with a plastic bag, throwing away diapers, she counted 17 scattered throughout the home. While the diapers were scattered about, all of them were neatly and tightly wrapped up, simply waiting to be thrown away.
Unexpectedly, the video went viral, garnering over 6.4 million views, nearly 10,000 comments, and 54,000+ reshares. Initially, many of the responses were disheartening. The top comment on the post reads, “This is absolutely not relatable.” Another nasty comment reads, “You don’t need a diaper genie to throw away diapers! Hope this helps!” Some commenters and posters even went as far as to threaten to call Child Protective Services on the mother. Others continued expressing criticism and judgment, even though Hannah clarified it was a one-day thing. Not only was she less than a month postpartum, but her husband had left her alone with two children for the first time while she was battling the flu so that he could go on a hunting trip. She explained she was in “survival mode” all day long, and the diapers were just pushed to the side.
Fortunately, numerous mothers came forward to defend Hannah from the mom-shaming she was facing.
What is the 17 diapers trend?
Despite the top comment on Hannah’s post telling her she’s not “relatable,” an entire trend developed of mothers confirming that, yes, her video was relatable for parents. Not everyone has been in the same situation as Hannah, who has 17 dirty diapers. However, numerous mothers could recall their lowest point during the postpartum period, when they were in survival mode and couldn’t find the energy to complete various household tasks.
TikTok user Julie Knapp shared that her “17 diapers” moment was not doing the laundry and leaving cups to grow moldy on her dresser because she was in postpartum at 19 and directing all her energy at keeping herself alive. In the caption, she wrote, “Lets [sic] start a trend of mommas who understand! What was your 17 diapers?”
Knapp’s video also went viral, with numerous mothers heeding the call to share their “17 diapers.” For most of the women, their stories included struggling with self-care or completing cleaning duties while experiencing the postpartum period for the first time, parenting solo, or struggling with postpartum depression. Although many of them struggled to do things like laundry or showering, they all ensured, even during these most trying times, that their baby was clean, safe, healthy, and well taken care of. Their 17 diaper moments didn’t mean that they were bad parents or that they routinely left their home dirty or unsanitary. Their moments simply confirmed that they were human and that it’s completely normal for mothers in postpartum to have days where they can be doing their absolute best but simply can’t do everything.
Sadly, some users continued criticizing these women for not being perfect mothers, with one user calling them “unfit” to be parents. The reactions only further confirm how very little people understand about postpartum. Many don’t seem able to comprehend that the levels of support women have vary or that postpartum experiences are different for everyone. Another thing the trend highlighted was sexism and double standards.
One can’t help but notice how everyone immediately decided to attack Hannah and threaten to call CPS on her for not picking up her kids’ diapers immediately. However, very few users came for the father, who left his family alone and struggling while he went off on a voluntary, fun outing. It’s not just Hannah, though. While some of the 17 diaper videos are from single mothers, not all of them were. Many of these videos raise the question of where the partners are. Most of the time, these women are just days or weeks postpartum and crumbling under the pressure. It shouldn’t have been left solely to these women to pick up the diapers, do the laundry, clean their pump parts, make the bed, and do every other household task.
The 17 diapers trend isn’t just to highlight the struggles women experience in postpartum but to demonstrate how it doesn’t have to be this way. Friends and family members need to step up and understand that the postpartum period shouldn’t be navigated completely solo. Instead of being horrified and self-righteous over 17 diapers, we as a society should be thinking about how to create better support systems for women so that they don’t have to go through their 17 diaper moments alone.